Dirty

The craving never stops.

I come home

And just like yesterday,

And all the days before that,

I get drawn towards you,

Like south to north,

And I crashland into your arms.

I begin to spill

The contents of my heart

Onto a stone-cold counter.

I let you drink from me,

Drain me,

Empty me.

Your embrace tightens

To the point where I can’t breathe

And the sting of your touch

Brings tears to my eyes

But when you let go,

It’s immediate;

The pain stops.

The tears stop.

All I feel and think stops.

The numbness,

Accompanied by the ringing in my ears,

Wraps a thin shawl around my shoulders.

It warms me a little –

At least enough to repel the penitence.

For a time, at least.

I stand up and go to the kitchen to have dinner.

Tomorrow,

We shall do this again.

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